Cynthia, The Dimensional Traveler

[TangAce]

Review time.

LMB - There is no reason for this to stop in place besides to expand one part of the kit into taking up multiple abilities when it shouldn't. I'll go into that more when talking about the abilities specifically. As it is, this would be insanely broken at close ranges, reaching literal thousands in the DPS department as you could repeatedly send it out and retract it for an easy 2000 DPS plus some from abilities.

RMB - This doesn't need to exist. It looks like you literally just took her attack and split its controls in half because you couldn't think of enough abilities. You could just make it to where her LMB is reactivated to retract the orb.

Q - This could very easily just be her reload. Its a waste of an ability. What purpose is there for a 500 damage burst on an 8 second cooldown? Again, you just took her LMB and spread it out. Realistically it would rarely ever be used anyways because this character would be played at close range due to their easily abused LMB.

F - This is fine. I would say it should be able to be activated when the orb isnt fully deployed to allow for slightly faster teleports but its not really necessary.

E - This ability is practically worthless. The ability to rapidly teleport should be good but the pointless 3s period for it to be cancelled means that it would be useless for what people would primarily want to use it for. Mobility heavy ultimates are more frequently used as an escape but for some reason you decided for that to not be the case with this. As it stands, its just a tool for charging in.... as a damage champion..... With no DPS increase. No added protection... Nothing.

Talents - Destroying Traverse has an awful name as you know but it seems like a potentially fun talent. Explosive Dance implies that there is a cooldown on the explosions from the ultimate but that is not included in the ultimate, leading me to assume you meant her Q's cooldown. Considering how useless her Q is, its not adding anything to the talent. Also, adding more speed to something that is only functionally useful for feeding the enemy team is... pointless. Growing Power is next to useless as it would require set up from a teammate or awful enemy positioning to add like 200 DPS to your LMB. Explosive Dance and Growing Power need to be replaced.

Cards - Most of these are the typical cards you'd see on a Damage champion. I want to specifically focus on the ones from her Q (Destroy) because of the ability's useless nature. With a loadout dedicated to Destroy, you get some decent at best sustain and point control. The issue is, it would require heavy loadout investment to make the ability at all worth using considering what her optimal play style would be (again, that is massive close range DPS). You'd be better off making Destroy a special reload for her and replacing a couple of her Armor/Weapon cards with Repulse and Renew. That would give her less typical Armor/Weapon cards (which is a fairly rare sight) as well as allowing her to have an actually useful ability for her Q. Also... you did cards for the ultimate instead of cards for her RMB. Which further prooves that the RMB is really just supposed to be an extension of her LMB to fill up space. And ultimates don't get cards.

Lore - Not much to say about the lore. I will say that she gives me SERIOUS Ultear (from Fairy Tail) vibes. Which is fine, because I like Ultear.

Total - 3/10. Due to the RMB and Q being essentially just components of her LMB, she feels very unfinished. Additionally, the balance on the LMB needs to be looked at to allow her to be more useful at long range and less potent at close range. The ultimate also needs to be looked at heavily, with the charge up time in particular being its biggest downfall. Other potential fixes for her ultimate would be some form of sustain or protection to justify the charge up time and overall danger that comes with using it. There being cards gets you bonus points but the mistake of having cards for the ultimate instead of the RMB is pretty serious and draws attention to the flaws of the kit. Thematically speaking though, I like the idea of the character because, as I said, it makes me think of a character I enjoy (specifically of a type that I don't believe is anywhere near being overused). I look forward to seeing what the art for it turns out like. There is a LOT of fixing up that need to be done but the character isn't a lost cause like some that occasionally pop up on the forums.

Oh, and a word of advice. When you respond to someone else's concept, try to be more constructive. Your response to Dimitri's concept was unnecessarily harsh and will be little help to him. Its okay to be harsh in your criticism if a concept deserves it, but remember to try to help them. We aren't here to tear down each other's ideas. We are here to build them up.

EDIT: Also, I'm sorry for the wall of text. When necessary I try to go in depth with my reviews. I know not everyone likes to read a wall of text and I can provide a TL;DR if necessary but it will result in a loss of detail and meaning (obviously).

well I guess I have been very hard on him, but I don't have much time right now to write long things^^' and if I answered it means I was interested in the concept and that I want it to get better, also that I don't have many ideas how to make it better, or rather more original
hum well if you find ultear vibes it's okay I guess but I haven't taken any inspirations from her

I wanted to make a champion relying mostly on her weapon, you might not like it but some actually like that
about close range damage, I have thought a lot about it, one solution is to reduce damage if you do not hold LMB, but some pointed out that it's not that broken, it's a projectile, if your enemy moves between your LMB and RMB then the RMB won't do any damage (that mostly depends on the animation, you can make like a 0.2sec waiting time between LMB and RMB, but I already said I would precise this when I have some time, so not really a burst since you can avoid half the damage (not even mentioning that furing the time your weapon is coming back to you, you are vulnerable since you can't do damage if backburst doesn't hit, should be enough for a flank to kill her, of course she has other skills to prevent that)
then about destroy, I'm not sure if you understand the use of having aoe? you know you can damage multiple persons, and at the same time it can increase your dps since you don't have to RMB is you use destroy, and since it's hard to hit with RMB because it depends on your position and enemy position (since aim have nothing to do with it to say it simply)
if you look at lian or cassie, they have very similar abilities (valor and blast...that have exactly the same purpose)
if she can traverse during the LMB then she would be way harder to flank
I'm not sure you understand the ult, this ult allows for mobility and aoe damage, which is hella strong, I'm more afraid of this ult being too OP than being useless, the 3sec cast are here to prevent people using it anytime they need their traverse cooldown to get away, since you can use it no matter your ult charge rate, also it obliges you to play with your team, and to think when you use it, not like some ults which are simply press a button and see them die
then you say the talent is useless, but no, it allows you to have aoe damage without having to teleport, the cooldown is here to prevent a 4000 aoe dps


so maybe you don't really imagine very well how she would be played,
but really I have worked a lot about her balance, compared to other current damage champs and so on, thought about combos and other stuff

and her cards yes are a bit generic, but if you look carefully, most (if not all) champions have these generic cards (and each role has his set of generic cards), for a reason, then she has original cards that no other have


I agree however on saying that RMB could be just LMB, but it would be less confusing to use separate buttons for separates abilities, the same some had proposed about lex weapons transformed into dual buttons, which in terms of gameplay is totally fine and gives a different experience, and also prevents blind spam

but really, this is original, can be made even better, already pretty good compared to other concept, there are no big unbalances, maybe some values adjustment, but the design itself isn't as I have seen in other posts, press button for win, or either broken or useless by design, it's also possible to implement into a game, and so on, and still I'm always reading and replying and modifying stuff according to feedbacks...

although, just you saying her ult would be useless makes me wonder how much you know about balance?


then now for dimitri
there is a min and max range, still I need to calculate it in game using units
she is not a blast champion, she simply has a blast ability as many other hitscans have (even shalin can have some blast) and the aoe is pretty decent, she's not a zoning champion like dredge
her escape, has a low cooldown because of how dangerous it is to use it, takes time if you want to go hiding from a flank, time during which you do not attack, and if you use it to make combos you find yourself in a very weird / bad position, the cd can be adjusted a bit tho

you have no idea of what this ult could do, first you gain mobility, which means you are way harder to hit, then your dps increases and becomes aoe, as said above I don't think you realize what this kind of mobility do
you also don't realize what 10sec is, ash's ult is 8sec, and just with this 8sec ult an entire team can be wiped, nando's ult is 4sec, just see how powerful it is, maeve, cassie, are simple ults doing no damage, see how powerful it is, how it can turn the tide of a match, that's what an ult is supposed to do, it gives a big advantage, and this one can give a huge advantage, that's why the cast time, you can hide during this time for exemple, but enemies need time to react to something like that


then playing with "dimensions" or something, is way too complicated to balance or even to implement in such a game, then, the lore came way after the concept
also you simply said what john said before you, so maybe he has some knowledge about balance and such, but you? I'm pretty sure you don't

anyway, you both don't see possible combos and such, I'll take some stuff you said and adjust some values accordingly, but try to think about other than separate abilities when you are writing a review

and both of you, I don't want a fight in this thread, so if you have anymore to say send pm